In my opinion, national elections bring out the worst in us! As Election Day draws near, we see people on “both sides of the aisle” acting like spoiled children. Let me give you a simple example. This morning I was reviewing Facebook and came across a post which read:
It is no longer about his character
It is about ours.
Let’s take a moment to think about this statement. The man that posted this feels strongly that if you were to vote for Trump, you have a character defect! This quote suggests that you are flawed because you see the election differently than he does. I want to be crystal clear, both sides do this. Both sides question your intelligence, character, patriotism, upbringing, and just about everything else that you might hold dear because – you see the choice differently. In my opinion, this is terrible and unfortunately, we sometimes say horrible things which are hurtful! Just recently, I was on a phone conversation with a friend and he basically said; “please don’t tell me you are considering voting for Trump.” After about an hour of listening to why this would be a bad decision, he ended with; “well – you can’t fix stupid.”
Sometimes we need to take a breath, remain quiet, and remember that it is GOOD that people see candidates and issues from different viewpoints. Not only do we see issues differently, we prioritize the importance of those issues differently – and that is also GOOD! If I were a first time home buyer and Vice President Harris states that she will work to help first time home buyers make this dream a reality, and this is very important for me, why should I not vote for Harris? If likewise, you are concerned about world peace and you feel our country needs a different voice and direction and this is your most important consideration, is voting for Trump illogical? If I am a union school teacher, I may see Harris as a better candidate for my self-interests. If I am very concerned about border security, Trump may be a logical choice. The idea that if you vote for Harris, you are stupid, or if you vote for Trump, you lack character, is preposterous.
In a book entitled; “If it weren’t for you, We could get along!” by Dr. Lewis Losoncy, he posits the following:
“Whenever any two people talk, each person is deciding to do one of two things.
- The first choice is to listen and to understand the other person from the other person’s vantage point.
- The second option is to judge the other person from one’s own vantage point.”
He is correct, wouldn’t you agree? I mean, do we really listen and try to understand the other person’s thoughts or do we listen to get ready to respond? During an election period, a better question might be, do we listen at all?
When we listen to judge (option 2 – see above), Losoncy gives an example of this “listening” as follows: “In other words, if we disagree, you have some work to do. For our relationship to succeed, you need to change. I don’t need to change because I am right. I’m surprised and annoyed that you can’t see that! As a result, we have”the blaming by judging” phenomena or “If it weren’t for you, we could get along!”
I had the privilege to visit with and enjoy dinner weekly with my father-in-law for many years before he went to heaven! We often viewed political issues differently and it was quite common for one of us to end the evening by saying, “we will just need to agree to disagree.” I will forever be thankful for our time together and our spirited debate.
I will end this short blog with a simple question; do you really want to lose a friend because they view a candidate differently? I sure hope that your friendship means more than that!
Our country will survive this election regardless of the candidate that wins – hopefully your friendships will as well!
Thanks, Tom
Thoughts / Comments
3 responses to “Election 2024 – Agree with Me or Else…!”
Tom your work here is thoughtful and applies fittingly to most situations friends and acquaintances find themselves amidst. Politics is a very emotionally charged topic for those who follow it closely and like to formulate opinions based on how they interpret the information they receive. It is especially sensitive during Presidential election years. I am a person who voices my opinion forcefully at times on politics. Your message that attentive listening is necessary to have constructive conversations is correct. I try to remain civil and respectful when I am with people with whom I disagree politically. Injecting a little light humor helps as well. One must feel comfortable though standing up for and stating what they truly believe and not feel as if it should be kept bottled up. Reality is there is much at stake on November 5, 2024. Thanks for you work here.
Hi Don! Thank you for reviewing the blog! Let me start by saying that I read most of your posts on Facebook and appreciate the amount of research that goes into what you write! In one of your most recent Facebook posts you made your case for President Trump very convincingly – the research was impressive!
A problem we have today is finding accurate information on our candidates (and just about everything else). I recently read Vivek Ramaswamy’s book entitled Truths. In this book, Ramaswamy takes on many of the popular narratives that are considered “facts”. In Chapter 9 of his book (Facts are not Conspiracies) he lays out popular narratives that are just not factually accurate or the information provided us is less than substantive. People today can cite “facts” for just about anything that they want to believe and this leads to some of the polarization we see. I recently spoke with a friend about RFK Jr’s book, The Real Anthony Fauci. His immediate response to my bringing up this book was; “He’s a Nut”. I must say, for being a “Nut”, he certainly makes a convincing case for problems in our healthcare system. The trouble we have today is people often refuse to entertain information that does not agree with their construct of reality. By the way, I see this from Conservatives as well as Liberals. One of the issues we face today is we seem to need to be 100% behind a person or we are deemed “not to be a real Republican or a real Democrat. I supported Vivek when he was running for president. That said, I do not agree with everything he posits. However, I agreed with enough of his thoughts to say I am a Vivek supporter. Ronald Reagan would say that if a fellow Republican supported his policies 80% of the time, he would consider that person a political allay. Today, 80% does not seem to be the bar.
I am rambling so let me end with this compliment, I really appreciate when you make a statement and support that statement with verifiable facts and information! As I said, I often read your thoughts and find them worthwhile.
Thomas ,
Excellent advice. The election will be won by majority vote. Someone will be elected. At the end of the day that person, whom ever it might be will need our support. We need to come together and work for the people. I’ve played on many teams where I didn’t like the captain, but I still worked my ass off. Let’s hope that politicians on both sides can do the same!